|Here we go...|
|This is what love looks like.|
In terms of how I am... I can't say I've been 100% (ha!). The medications I was originally prescribed caused all kinds of awful side effects, so my doctor has switched me to three different ones to try to help with depression, anxiety, and sleep issues. The former does seem to be abating, but at the cost of panic attacks and generalized anxiety being increased, oddly enough. My sleep is definitely the most improved of the three, and that's having some benefits during the day, of course. I've been struggling with self-concept, security, and my identity as a whole. I seem to fall down a lot (figuratively, though those who know me will also know I tend to also literally fall down a lot, although the two things aren't related) and I often feel lost. But this week I've been consciously trying harder to find and accept myself as I am now, and to look at the positives more intentionally as much as is possible. I'm not really sure what to say other than I cognitively know that I am very fortunate with the support and love and opportunities I have in my life, and while only I can truly help myself back to who I want to be, focusing on those things and making an effort to take the same care of myself as others do of me can only be a step forward. We'll see how things go. There is always hope.